In honor of Valentine's Day I thought I'd share with you some text messages I've received in the past few months from random Cameroonian men, for your own enjoyment. Because yes, they are quite entertaining. Lesson learned: Cameroonian men are very, very dramatic. And definitely fall in love at first sight, even without more than three words exchanged.
12/7 17:49
bsr je suis oblige d tappelle car jai toujour envie de suivre ta voi et ce ma premiere foi decrire 1 msg. AbdulRaman
translation: goodevening i'm obliged to call you since i still/always desire to follow/hear your voice. this is my first time writing a (text) message.
1/29 23:05
slt dit je n ariv ps a control ma nouvel affection pr tw j ai ete decu m je lie ms stimt pr tw e a la patience j amrai gagne l affection d tn amite pr la suite. Ahmad the moto driver
hello listen i'm not able to control my new affection/love for you i was disappointed (when i texted to tell him i didn't need him to pick me up) i have my esteem for you and with patience i would like to win your affection and your friendship following.
1/30 16:17
slt cm va tu je sns pas 2 panse toi eliza je n une second rtard ta beaute me donne l'idee d joie tn image d ta bell face apparait dans mes yeux! bne soire eliza Ahmad the moto driver
hello how are you i don't know what you think eliza i ? one second late your beauty gives me the idea of joy and your image of your beautiful face appears in my eyes! good night eliza.
2/12 17:09
Qu tu me croi ou pas moi g pense a toi ca parai bizar ou terrifien el tu me mank. l'ocean a moin d'eau ke mon ker a? si tu poura compter ls etoil ds le ciel? Hammadou
whether you believe me or not, i think of you that seems bizarre or scary el i miss you. the ocean has less water than my heart has? if you could count the stars in the sky.
2/14 19:44
Tu a transforme ma vie en poesi e je te 2mand d'agir avec moi selon tn keur me sentiment pr toi st 6 for ke le garde secret sere impo6ble mn bb jetmmm k66666. Yannick the waiter
you transformed my life into poetry and i ask you to be with me according to your heart my feeling for you is so strong to keep a secret would be impossible. My baby I looove you. kiss.
2/14 20:03
bebe si g meurs c soir c sera d'amour et peine car au pres de toi ma vie est eternel. anonymous
Baby if i die tonight it will be of love and pain since next to you my life is eternal.
Now some of you might be wondering why these people have my phone number, and yes it's a good question. And every time I'm about to hand over the real digits I stop and think, hmm "do I really want to do this?" But every time it seems completely normal and mundane, even with no more than 3 sentences conversation exchanged...a moto driver who you need to come back and pick you up from the Bible Study and take you home. The waitor who has a restaurant next to a carpenter and said he'd be happy to bargain with the carpenter when he returned for a piece of furniture you wanted. A friend's homestay brother. And the thing is after a few weeks of non-returned lovesick phone calls and texts, they usually get over it and move on. Still, 95% of the time a man says "Well can I get your contact? Do you have a phone? Can I have your number?" the answer is NO!
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2 comments:
oh Elizabeth! I am so LOL! Brings back great, sometimes embarrasing moments in Liberia! Even after returning home I still receive texts from "your future husband". They really are quite dramatic, that's a GREAT word to describe it! I remember laughing, blushing, shaking my head, and rolling my eyes with so many of these crazy texts. I suppose that the Cameroonian and Liberian women also get these dramatic messages too. I wonder what THEY think? LOL. I suppose these wouldn't seem so strange if American guys did this...but we can't even get them to admit they like us--let alone be so bold after a few words exchanged. Great post and thanks for inducing some giggles.
I think you should go for the one for whom 'your beauty gives him joy' and who 'sees your face when he closes his eyes!'
or the one who has more love for you than there is water in the ocean and stars in the sky!
Will the poetic language continue after the "honeymoon" stage of the relationship? Will the love STILL have more water than the ocean? Are the declarations of love a declaration of life-long commitment? Can you ask those questions every time they declare their love? Then they will probably all say yes.. hehe
you are just TOO beautiful!!
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